How to Stop Complaining and Transform Your Life with Compassion
In our culture, complaining has become very common. We complain verbally, in writing, and specially in our minds. Dr. Travis Bradberry points out in his book *How Complaining Rewires Your Brain for Negativity*, that complaining not only expresses negativity, but it also rewires the brain, making future complaints come more easily, as the pattern becomes a subconscious way of being. This affects our relationships with others and, most importantly, with ourselves.
Why Do We Complain So Much?
Throughout life, we “normalized” to over focus on problems and difficulties rather than on the sunny side and the solutions, which ends up trapping us in a cycle of constant negativity and complaint. This habit stems from conditioned subconscious beliefs that drive us to focus on what is wrong, what is missing, or what is flawed in our lives. Complaining is one of the many ways that perpetuate the idea that life is filled with drama.
Reflection
Now, let´s take a moment to pause and reflect. Consider how often you complain about the people around you—your partner, your job, your children, your parents, or even yourself. Where did you learn that relationships, including the one with yourself, are difficult, inadequate, complicated and/or insufficient?
Have you ever wondered if it’s possible to change the way you perceive and experience life? Have you considered what can you do to start seeing your relationships with “fresh eyes” and from a more expansive and constructive perspective?
So… Is It Possible to Stop Complaining?
The answer is and enthusiastic “definitely yes”. It is indeed possible to reprogram our perspective on life and start viewing our relationships from a place of greater compassion and connection.
This is where our proposal for a Good Vibes Movement comes in. This is an initiative that invites you to actively transform complaining and negativity into opportunities for personal growth to promote more harmony in your immediate environment.
But wait.. the Good Vibes Movement is NOT toxic positivity!
It’s important to clarify that this movement is not about toxic positivity, where problems are ignored, and everything is painted as rosy and perfect. This kind of thinking denies and negates our human nature, which is so full of nuances, emotions, and feelings, all valid and essential for our human and spiritual growth.
In fact, these emotions and feelings are what make us human, and they help us move toward the most authentic version of ourselves. Recognizing that life comes with challenges and difficulties allows us to live more authentically.
The idea is to be more and more aware of the reactive complaining pattern that is triggered by moments of discomfort, frustration, or confusion, so that we can reprogram it to ignite a
How to Transform The Complaining Pattern with Compassion
Our Good Vibes Movement proposal is grounded in the reality that life happens every day and presents us with a diversity of situations which cause discomfort, confusion, and frustration. These situations often make us question our self-worth and our ability to feel that we are enough. The idea, is that in those moments, we pause and become aware of the emotion that is coming up — anger, judgment, confusion, annoyance, sadness, guilt, shame– and learn to use compassion in order transform that all so human reaction of complaining or lashing out at those involved.
Here are some practical ideas — when you face a situation that awakens the complainer within you, stop, invite the most compassionate version of you and ask:
How could I view this from a different angle, from a place of compassion and good vibes?
Here are a few examples:
“What my mom just said is unacceptable! She thinks she is always right.”
From the Good Vibes point of view: “My mom has the right to think differently. I appreciate that, thanks to her, I am who I am today.”
“I feel rejected for not being able to capture everyone´s attention during my presentation.”
From the Good Vibes point of view: “I am valuable for who I am. I do my best, and I that is good enough.”
“I can’t stand people who complain all the time.”
From the Good Vibes point of view: “I can learn to be more curious about how others experience life and what I can learn from them.”
A Movement to Transform Your Life
The Good Vibes Movement is not to become a challenge which would require effort and criticism. Nor is it about empty, meaningless optimism that seeks to hide or deny life’s difficult situations. It is an invitation to realize that our environment has programmed us to complain about everything, to see the “bad” side of what happens to us, or to see ourselves as insufficient when facing life’s challenges.
These are learned programs! Hence, they can be reprogrammed so we can stop living in such a disempowered mode. Through the subconscious programming that can be easily achieved with PSYCH-K®, every day we see more and more people transforming the way they view themselves through love and compassion, and consequently they see their life through “new eyes” filled with gratitude, creativity, joy, and enthusiasm.
As a first step to join the Good Vibes Movement, how about setting the intention to become aware of the moments when you are complaining and finding a new way to address it or express it? When you find a new way, celebrate it in any way that makes suits you — a self-hug, a small dance, a reverence, etc.
And, if you want to make it easy, simple and effective you can learn how to use PSYCH-K® in your daily life to reprogram the subconscious programming that is limiting your full potential.